Friday, August 21, 2009

Forest Hill

(please click on the picture to see the text)

"Forest Hill is an affluent neighbourhood in central Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Along with Hoggs Hollow, Rosedale, The Bridle Path, and Lawrence Park, it is considered to be one of Toronto’s wealthiest neighbourhoods."

From Wikipedia

Today the love of my life (TLOML) and I went for our usual 7 km walk through Cedarvale ravine, under Bathurst bridge, up the hill through Forest Hill village, back to Eglinton. Everything was alright, until we, while walking up the hill on Spadina Road did not hear the alarm went off loudly. I said it was the house alarm. TLOML said it was the car alarm. Does not really matter, it was loud and did not stop for all the time we were walking up hill, five, six minutes, until we walked so far away that we could not hear it anymore. Then I started my rant. First of all why do these people need such big, huge, enormous million dollar houses, some of them surrounded with tall fences, hiding from the rest of the world, as if the rest of the world is not worthy them. I continued ranting, while TLOML was showing me the swimming pool and commented how nice, good looking swimming pool that was. I said I did not care ( and I said something even worse but I will not share it with you, but what I said prompted TLOML to say it reminded him of the movie Fight Club ), and that I was going to print the pamphlet in 500 copies and deliver it like a flyer to those houses. I want them to know that they are rich because some other people are poor. I want them to know that they are no better than any homeless person on the streets of Toronto, they are just shrewder. I want to tell them in my pamphlet that they live in those big houses because their great grand fathers were using cheap labor to make huge profits. I want them to know that according to me they should be ashamed they live in those big houses while there is so much poverty in this city. Well, TLOML was laughing at me, really. He asked me very practical question: where will you print 500 copies of your pamphlet. I will go to Kinko. One day I will do it, I swear to God.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Mom, why God chose me to have autism?

Because my son, if there is God (I personally tend to be more scientifically oriented), so if there is God, from what I learned in my life so far, we are created the way we are so that we and other people can learn from each other. Therefore, my dear son, if God exists, and God chose you to have autism, it is because you have the strength to teach those ignorant around you how to treat with respect people they perceive different from them.

But mom, why me, I do not want to have autism.

I know, I know Aleks, you want to be just the same as everyone else, and it is so much easier ( I guess? ), but the plan for you is not that you will figure things out easily. I mean social things: when to say something, when not to say ( we all struggle with that but we, who are neurotypical (NT) we know for which clues to look to figure that one out), when to laugh, when a person is sarcastic, what the person you are talking to has on his or her mind, and so on. There will be a lots of trial and error for you. There will be people along way that you will meet and they will be those nice people who have empathy and who will be able to see a nice person in you. I am sure there will be some not so nice people that will tease you or even worse to try to torment you and abuse you. Sometimes these mean people will be disguised as nice people. Sometimes even some adults whom you trust so much will be those mean people who look like and behave like nice people. They will tell you that you cannot do things, they will separate and segregate you under excuse that it is for your own benefit, they will pretend that they care. The good news is that sooner or later their real agenda will become obvious and then I will do everything I can to stop them. I know it may not be enough, and surely is not enough, but you have me. I love you very very much, and I believe that love is the strongest medicine, the strongest force in this world. As long as I walk on this planet you will have me as your protector. After that, I am sure that you will be able to take care of yourself, and even when I am not around anymore my love will stay with you. Do not worry my dear son, someone who is such a beautiful person, as you are, will always find love in this world. Just hang in there. Ok Aleks?